No More Brexit
I'm all Brexitted out. It was a bad idea to start with and now I'm just sick of it. I think this is the general consensus among the population. As a result I've come up with the following proposal.
Proposal: creation of Brexit In The Bin Party.
Main policy points: noone is allowed to mention Brexit again ever. As a result the party upon election will be renamed In The Bin Party. Other words that are banned are Remainers, Leavers, Remoaners, Brexshitters and any other derivation of.
All policies on international economics to be decided by actual experts in the field. Referendums are to be used solely for naming boats (Boaty McBoatface was a fine name for a boat), tv talent shows and Facebook "is this called a bread roll or a teacake?" memes.
If experts decide financially we should stay in the EU we will take it seriously and vote for people in to change it how we want. No we don't want an EU army, we like our pound coins and we want to control our own domestic policy. We will not send in UKIP candidates or any other joke candidates who are actively working against it.
The 3 billion set aside for Brexit preparations will be divided up to give each UK resident £50. The Brexit bus will be used as a free transport service to anyone travelling to the airport for an EU flight.
If financially we can get a better deal out of Europe we will. But we'll go the whole hog. We'll leave, print blue passports and refuse to take part in the UEFA cup and Eurovision. Holidays in Europe will be banned as will the TV series Benidorm. The song The Final Countdown will also be removed from UK radio playlists.
In either event the 31st October will become a bank holiday where everyone must have Halloween parties and be nice to each other.
Our slogan will be: Be Nice To Each Other.
I'll need some financial backers so spread the word. So far I've just got this 20p coin I found down the back of the sofa.
Proposal: creation of Brexit In The Bin Party.
Main policy points: noone is allowed to mention Brexit again ever. As a result the party upon election will be renamed In The Bin Party. Other words that are banned are Remainers, Leavers, Remoaners, Brexshitters and any other derivation of.
All policies on international economics to be decided by actual experts in the field. Referendums are to be used solely for naming boats (Boaty McBoatface was a fine name for a boat), tv talent shows and Facebook "is this called a bread roll or a teacake?" memes.
If experts decide financially we should stay in the EU we will take it seriously and vote for people in to change it how we want. No we don't want an EU army, we like our pound coins and we want to control our own domestic policy. We will not send in UKIP candidates or any other joke candidates who are actively working against it.
The 3 billion set aside for Brexit preparations will be divided up to give each UK resident £50. The Brexit bus will be used as a free transport service to anyone travelling to the airport for an EU flight.
If financially we can get a better deal out of Europe we will. But we'll go the whole hog. We'll leave, print blue passports and refuse to take part in the UEFA cup and Eurovision. Holidays in Europe will be banned as will the TV series Benidorm. The song The Final Countdown will also be removed from UK radio playlists.
In either event the 31st October will become a bank holiday where everyone must have Halloween parties and be nice to each other.
Our slogan will be: Be Nice To Each Other.
I'll need some financial backers so spread the word. So far I've just got this 20p coin I found down the back of the sofa.
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